Find me Back

at my other blog http://lilpeasinmypodfromgod.blogspot.com/ All the blogs was too confusing! Just leaving myself where I have been for years so re-add me

Religion is the problem. When I step back, rip away all the "good wife, good mother, good this and that books," I actually miss having a relationship with God. I do believe. I don't know what I believe about the Bible at this point and time as I have read so much in reference to it that is annoying or discrediting, but I do know in my heart that God exists. I cannot go a day without praying several times "on accident," lately as I was just over everything and trying to step back from it all. I need to be able to pray and realized that it is so natural to me that its like drinking water during the day. I just feel that God has to be real, up there. I don't know much else at this point as I don't really believe much more than that right now.

 Religion is definately the problem and even the Bible which I certainly don't take 100% literally anymore says "James 1:27
Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world." This is merely one example of many I could pull up. Basically what I am getting at is that a relationship with your God, whoever he may be, is what is important and for me......essential to live. I cannot believe that a loving God would be in Heaven, angry at me for being bisexual if that is how I was created by Him. I'm definately not trying to sit here and toot my own horn, but I feel I am a generally good person, practicing good deeds as an example to my children and being a charitable, kind and thoughtful type of mother and that is what I feel is important. I don't care about prescribed rules of religion. In fact, I want nothing to do with them, yet I believe in my heart of hearts God must exist because trying to shut Him out for even more than a day is impossible for me. It literally cannot happen. I have kept all this private until now because I really thought for a day there, maybe even 2, that I didn't believe in God at all. While following "Religion," I missed the entire point and made myself miserable too.

Hospitality

So Nate and I are challenging ourselves to more hospitality. It's a lost art, an important one for keeping close relationships with family and friends. This is a tough one for me right now in this season of my life(throwing up daily), but as I begin to feel better, this should come much easier. We are working on inviting someone, friends or family, each week for dinner. Its fun, helps us expand our cooking skills and friendships! Tonight we are hosting a friend I have known since jr highschool. I am excited to see her. It will be fun to catch up since she moved away for a year and is now back to the area. I have no clue who we will ask to come by next week, but it will be someone!  An added benefit is cleaning the house super good for company which means it stays nicer during the week. I am working hard on self improvement, that's mainly gratitude for the real important things in life. What matters is close relationships with family and friends. My kids, my husband, my animals, walking in the fresh air pushing along my babies even while dry heaving. The all day sickness will pass along like it did with all the other children and I will soon have a cute belly to replace it. I have to chose to live in gratitude each day, each hour, each minute. It doesn't come naturally, but someday with practice, it will.

Fresh Off the Crochet Hook!

I think Jax really loves it:)

Turkey Day is on the Way

So is our first possibility of snow :O tonight! EEeeep:) Yay

A Fun Project for the Day

I spent today doing this lap quilt. I love the fabrics and while they feel fallish, they will work year round as well. On a really good note, I found my crochet hooks! Now its time to start making Christmas gifts......the best!

School Update

I promised this post a while back, but life happened so here I am! So, the school the kids are attending is absolutely perfect, NO....I'm not being sarcastic! This school is seriously the best school ever. Its as adorable and picturesque outside as the inner workings are.

 Kayla has adjusted perfectly and quickly made rank to one of the most popular girls in 6th grade. My phone rings off the hook for her when she is not in school. She has a birthday party or outing of some sort she attends almost every weekend! She made lead part*(Belle) in the school play of Beauty and the Beast, a musical. She is really enjoying school and I couldn't be happier for her. Her teacher is amazing as well.

Wyatt, oh Wyatt......this was what my perfect little mind dreamt of for 5 years while I homeschooled him. He is in a special day class for mild kids. He has kids from regular classrooms who come in for just one subject through the day as well. He is mingling with peers who are similar to himself with mild aspergers or just learning issues. He has made quick friends with 2 kids in his class and stolen the hearts of Kayla's friends on the playground and during breakfast and lunch:) He has yet to be bullied or have any social problems. He is THRIVING! I am ecstatic. His teacher is truly a miracle, so is the aid in the class. They send new things home with all sorts of creative devices to keep pushing Wyatt along in math and reading and spelling. Its amazing to see the academic achievement he is capable of. He is scoring 80-100% each week on spelling tests with challenging words. His reading is improving and his math.....omg I cannot believe the way his teacher has creatively taught him to do very high level math. He is dividing difficult 2-3 digit numbers, multiplying the same and I just couldn't be happier. They move along at his personal pace. He is also getting speech, occupational therapy and physical therapy which are things I cannot provide for him at home. I could squeal with happiness for the burdens lifted off me and the pure joy I feel for Wyatt.

Everett, much like Kayla is a social butterfly. He has lots of friends, does extremely well academically and has a wonderful teacher. He does his homework quickly and easily without help and loves to read. He is enjoying school a great lot because of all the friends he has made.

Tanner had some severe adjustment issues. I won't lie. The beginning was tough and I almost brought him home by himself for the year. I pursued a new teacher that was a K/1 combo(hes 1st grade but VERY immature socially) and this was the absolute perfect fit for him. The crying stopped. He quickly became attached to his current teacher and she gives me regular progress reports of how well he is doing socially and academically. It makes me so happy. She has nicknamed him "boots," because he is my little cowboy who wears nothing but his cowboy boots to school each day. They have made him quite popular and other kids have now acquired their own pairs:) hehe.

Hands down, school has been the single best decision for my children ever.....but now was the right timing! I don't regret homeschooling, in fact, I loved it! I still do "schooly" stuff with my babies I have at home all day. Its nice to see my kids flourishing though and moving to a new stage of life. We are all happy and this school couldn't be better, I mean that and how many people can say that about a public school? We are lucky!